Mall Heat
Have you noticed a phenomenon in your town where the malls have police stations in them? Maybe it's just a Denver thing, but pert' near every mall has a cop shop, and I'm not talking about mall security headquarters; I'm talking full-on Lakewood/Broomfield/Lone Tree Police Departments, with the flotilla of police cruisers backed lovingly into their assigned parking spots.
In the case of Lone Tree, there is a dollop of logic that may be afoot: Lone Tree, you see, is the very model of suburban sprawl of the worst kind, easily one of the most shit-forsaken cartoon places in the Denver area. The focal point of the town &emdash;and I use the term as charitably as I can muster&emdash; is the Park Meadows Mall, a ginormous festering shoppertainment fantasia. Its clientele consists almost entirely of nouveau-riche Range Rover-driving exurbanites who all seem to have nothing better to do on a weekday than find ways to divest themselves of their disposable income. I can't even set foot in the place without getting pissed off. But anyway, if you've ever had occasion to visit Lone Tree, it should come as no surprise that they use Hummers as police cruisers, which... if there's a more obvious symbol of American gluttony, I can't imagine what it is.
The point is that in Lone Tree, the mall may as well be City Hall, so it's not too surprising that they'd have a cop shop set up there.
Dude, that photo just screams cowboy fascism, doesn't it? Don't want to sound too much like a fashion critic, but I don't thhink I've ever seen fatigue pants tucked into tactical boots under the shade of a straw cowboy hat. This guy and his, ahem, cruiser look completely stupid. Nice rims, dipshit. The taxpayers must be psyched to see you rolling through the parking lot.
Lone Tree must really suck, Yale.
- mhaze November 21, 2006 14:50